I was standing behind a couple at a busy hotel reception recently. The husband asked his wife: ‘What time shall I book the taxi for?’ The woman, struggling with various bags and cradling a mobile phone in her shoulder, whilst conversing with the receptionist, spectacularly lost her temper at this question. She told him just what he could do with the taxi. The air was blue and the husband stood open mouthed.

The scene graphically reminded me of how we can unconsciously soak up stress to the point where just one more ‘burden’ or question makes us erupt like a volcano. Of course, we then have to deal with the fall-out and associated feelings. Life can feel like a roller coaster that you can’t get off at times.

If you find this is your experience and you want to regain control and clarity in your life then here is a course of action for you to consider.

The aim of it is to re-educate your senses so they more usefully pick up the stress triggers around you. Therefore, instead of absorbing the stress on each trigger you monitor them and take remedial action. That means less time in an inner world of mind talk and thoughts about what’s right, wrong or unfair. Because it’s very difficult to be rational from this perspective, you’re more likely to feel burdened, overwhelmed or enraged.

So to avoid these feelings you need a game plan that has you notice earlier when you’re retreating into your thoughts. Then you can challenge them and come back to real time and work on what action you can take. This means you’ll have more control and less stress. A very worthwhile change to make.

Discipline to Make Change

If you’ve had to learn a new skill lately you’ll know it takes discipline and application. But if you are interested in and excited by the rewards you’ll find it’s much easier than you think. It’s important to make the commitment to yourself. Why not decide from tomorrow that you will stop and check at different times of the day how you are and whether you’re getting lost in thoughts. Michael Neill, a self-help guru, suggests that you pause, breathe, put your hand on your heart and just tune in to you for a moment or two. This trains you to inhabit the real world rather than that of your inner machinations.
You could even just check every quarter hour or so whether there’s anything to stress about around you. Maybe check for lions, bears, or beasts rushing at you! Crazy but nonetheless it’s this sort of conscious checking that will have you change your habitual pattern of disappearing into the jungle of fretful thoughts. These just lead to you abosrbing more stress.
Often the source of stress is not the situation but the way we think about it. Challenging our thoughts and not getting consumed by them frees us to tackle problems with more clarity and energy.

How about making a start today? Let me know how you get on or what your experience is of the above.

For some instant advice and relief you can download your free report on the Sypmtoms of Burnout and How to Recover. Go to the homepage and look to the right of the screen.